Holding steady

I weighed in today on the scale at work and I was the same today as I was last Thursday - 30 lbs down.  I can tell that I am getting close to having my "monthly" friend.  I feel like I could eat the paint off the walls even though I am not hungry at all.  I just want to EAT!  This past weekend wasn't the greatest either.  I ate dessert on Saturday night, which I haven't done since I started all this.  Then I was off work Monday which meant an extra day of being "off" on my normal schedule.  I do really good during the week when I have a set schedule.  On the weekends, not so great because there is no schedule there.  I found myself being glad I was back at work on Tuesday just so I could get back on track.  I hate this feeling - feeling like I could eat the walls when I'm not hungry.  I almost got depressed when I weighed this morning but then I thought, "at least I didn't gain any weight."  My surgery is exactly 2 months from today and the closer it gets the more excited and nervous I get all at the same time.  I desire your prayers because losing weight is still an everyday battle.  My pray is that God will take the control that food has over my life away and allow me to control it....or maybe I should say let him control it because he has all the power and I have none!  I am excited over the fact that I am one size down in my clothes and I am able to wear work clothes that I haven't worn in a long time!  It will get better - I know it will....as soon as my monthly shows up.  The week prior is the worst for me.  I am still encouraged though at how much better I feel already.  Brighter days ahead!